F-f-f-f-five Th-th-things that D-d-d-d-don't S-s-s-s-s-suck, Chattering Teeth Edition

1. dogs who are smart enough to sleep in when it's really cold out
2. that $15 wool coat I bought a month or so ago
3. layers
4. fleece-lined anything
5. warm slippers*

*I don't think Santa reads this blog, but I figure it's worth a shot